The Lie of "I Should Be Able to Do This Alone"
Discover why believing you should do everything alone keeps you stuck, and how life coaching can help you find clarity, courage, and meaningful change.
You Don’t Have to Do This Alone
Have you ever found yourself thinking, "I should be able to figure this out on my own"?
It’s such a common belief, especially among women who are capable, empathetic, and used to being the one others turn to for support. You might be the planner, the organiser, the emotional anchor. And because of that, the idea of asking for help might feel unnecessary—even indulgent.
But here’s the truth: trying to do everything alone doesn’t make you strong. It makes you stuck.
Why the Self-Reliance Myth Is So Seductive
From a young age, many of us are taught that strength looks like independence. That resilience means pushing through. That needing help is a weakness.
We internalise messages like:
You should have it all together.
Other people manage, why can't you?
If you just try harder, you'll get there.
But what if that belief is the very thing holding you back?
Roots run wild beneath benevolent rich soil.
The Cost of Going It Alone
When you're stuck in your own head, it becomes hard to hear your own wisdom. You cycle through the same thoughts. You doubt your instincts. You feel foggy, uncertain, and disconnected from what you truly want.
You may start:
Overthinking even small decisions
Feeling like nothing you do is "enough"
Losing confidence in your ability to make change
Trying to sort through it all alone often leads to burnout, resentment, or paralysis.
Coaching Is Not About Fixing You
One of the biggest misconceptions about coaching is that it's about giving advice or telling you what to do.
But coaching is not about fixing anything. You're not broken.
A good coach creates a space for you to:
Hear yourself clearly
Explore what matters most
Make aligned decisions from a grounded place
It’s not about being rescued. It’s about being witnessed—and that can change everything.
Life coach jilly in the Sahara Desert.
What Happens When You Say Yes to Support
When clients come to me, they often say things like:
"I didn’t think I needed coaching, but now I wish I’d started sooner."
"Just saying it out loud helped me realise what I already knew."
"I finally feel like I’m not spinning my wheels."
Coaching doesn’t magically make life easy. But it helps you:
Get clear on what actually matters
Feel more grounded and confident
Take brave, meaningful action
And all of that begins with a moment of honesty: "I don’t want to do this alone anymore."
You Deserve Support
If you’re reading this and resonating with any part of it—know this: you are not weak for wanting support. You are wise.
You’re allowed to want clarity. To want ease. To be deeply supported while navigating a transition, a challenge, or just the feeling that something's off.
You don’t have to prove your strength by struggling in silence.
Ready to Talk?
If you're curious about what coaching could look like for you, I offer free discovery calls. There’s no pressure and no push. Just a space to connect and see if it feels right.
